Haul Out the Holly… and the whiskey.

Christmas at the White House, courtesy Flickr user M.V. Jantzen

Christmas at the White House, courtesy Flickr user M.V. Jantzen

While Comedy in DC is on December hiatus, it occurred to me that right after the infamous office holiday party, family holidays are the next best source of unintentional comedy. I think the Post’s Carolyn Hax got some hard-to-top stories, but I’m sure there are some other good ones floating around out there, just waiting to be shared.

From freak turkey-carving accidents, to mom’s opinion of your new boyfriend (my dad remembers well the holiday in which my grandmother told them she missed my mom’s old boyfriend), to family drama oozing out around the corners of Christmas dinner (food fight!), or gifts that make you wonder whether you’ve offended the giver in some way, the holidays, with their gifts and merrymaking and alcohol consumption always seem to bring out the ridiculous in people. And this year, with the Inauguration coming hot on the heels of the holidays, it seems even more fraught for the family members who live here, with relatives inviting themselves over to stay for the festivities, thus extending this uh, joyful family season for another three weeks.

Unlike office holiday parties, I actually recommend alcohol as a way to enhance your enjoyment of family gatherings. There’s nothing like a pleasant buzz to make your uncle’s antics entertaining rather than creepy.

When I was 16, I got into an argument at some holiday gathering with my aunt, the family instigator, and she got so angry… she mooned me.  For years after that, the universal gesture for telling her she was being ridiculous about something was to turn around and show her your ass. I know, it’s not as over-the-top as the Hax submitter who went to the family thanksgiving that turned into a murder confession, but we can’t all have families that crazy.

So it’s time to share, DC. What ridiculous things happen to you at the holidays? The worst gift you’ve gotten? You can remain anonymous- we promise not to tell your mother-in-law that the collection of Franklin Mint collectible kitten plates went straight to Goodwill.

Tiffany Baxendell Bridge is an Internet enthusiast and an incurable smartass. When not heckling the neighborhood political scene on Twitter, she can be found goofing off with her ukulele, Bollywood dancing, or obsessing about cult TV. She is That Woman With the Baby In the Bar.

Tiffany lives in Brookland with her husband Tom, son Charlie, and two high-maintenance cats. Read why Tiffany loves DC.

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