How lazy can America get?

Really, how lazy I ask. This is the country where people get in fights over a parking space 10 feet closer to the door. Where I see spry folks taking elevators to the second floor and we drive anywhere father than the mailbox (and I bet some of you have even done that!).

As a result, we have a national obesity epidemic; 65 percent of U.S. adults are either overweight or obese and heart disease and diabetes kill 30% of the population. And what great inventions have we developed in this climate of abject laziness?

May I present the apex of lazy – the Segway rickshaw!

Now even the tiring concept of standing, much less actually walking, is eliminated for greater access to our nation’s monuments by the sidewalk SUV.

Move aside careful pedestrian, run in the road healthy jogger, we are the Segway sidewalk SUV tourists, so lazy, so corpulent we cannot even lean forward to effect movement.

Next up, the Segway rickshaw with attached keg and Super Sized Happy meal deal express – ride the Mall then get a double bypass on the way home!

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Married, mortgaged, and soon to be a father, Wayan Vota is in the fast lane to mid-life respectability – until the day his brood finds his intimate journal of global traveling and curses him with the ever-eternal reply “I’m gonna be just like you, Dad!”

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