Sorry, couldn’t resist.

I’ve got a family heirloom ring I need to get cleaned-

Stop squealing and jumping up and down. No, not for that. You can stop being excited and my darling girlfriend can breath a sigh of relief, it’s an old ring of my grandda’s that I forgot I had.

– as well as a 100 year old pocket watch that needs some repair. I’d like a recommendation rather than just trusting whatever names google spits up for jewelry repair. The watch repair listing is even more anemic and you can be DAMN sure I’m not taking this to some mall kiosk.

So, if you’ve had an item you care about serviced, where did you go that you were happy with?

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Reading about the illegal immigration laws passed in Price William and Loudoun counties, I am struck by the foaming-mouthed obstinacy of those who stop at the word “illegal”.

The upstanding citizens of both counties that refuse to debate any aspect of the multi-faceted relationship we have with immigration in America if the word “illegal” is present. It really defies all rational thought. Until you replace the word “illegal” with the word “foreigners”.

And in this context, I mean the definition of “foreigners” as people who are different in language, culture, and maybe physical appearance, and almost importantly, who are perceived as having a lower socio-economic status.

To test out my proposition, let’s take a few quotes as an example, and substitute “foreigners” for “illegal” and you’ll see what I mean.

Sue Flemining of Help Save Manasas

“If we turn our heads and permit illegal foreigners entry into our county without making any effort or identification, we are saying our language, our culture, our Constitution, our neighborhoods and our flag are inconsequential.”

Eugene A. Delgaudio (R-Sterling>

“We need help in Loudoun. We are struggling. We are a small county, and we can’t handle the hordes that are coming here and using up our services. Illegal Foreign immigration is taking a greater and greater toll on our community.”

Reading these two quotes in their new form, do you see what I mean? The upstanding citizens of Price William and Loudoun counties really don’t care about legal or illegal, that is a red herring. They are really scared about “those people” the different ones who do not conform to the accepted norms of sterile suburban life. Or as Woodbridge resident Chris King said:

“I’m tired of pressing ‘1’ for English” on the phone.

And I am tired of obscene hypocrisy of people like Ms. Fleming and Misters Delgaudio and King. The hypocrisy of their desire to discriminate against the very foreigners who built the houses those very upstanding citizens sleep in, pick the fruit they eat, wash the dishes they eat off, mow the lawns they take pride in, and pretty much do every menial minimum-wage-at-best job none of those very same upstanding citizens would ever demean themselves with.

Especially since we are all immigrants in the end.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Are you a “Wanda”? And if so, did you celebrate your name day right?

Did you get free flowers for all “Wanda” women?

Palace Florists was worshiping Wanda’s all day long much to my displeasure. Why would free flowers displease me?

No one does a “Wayan” name day, for flowers or anything else.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Back in March our friend Mr Darpino mentioned the one-time Dismemberment Plan concert being held as a benefit at the Cat. On my drive home last night I caught NPR’s All Things Considered doing a story on the cause of the event, Callum Robbins’s spinal muscular atrophy. What’s that? Well, you can read the story or click the listen button at the top to hear it as I did. It’s an interesting and – dare I say it – heartwarming story.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

That’s my first and, I think, last foray into the world of sports announcer quips. I feel dirty.

Anyway, Baltmore team Fragilay – mentioned back here – was bumped out of the WSOPC last night on VH1. It was fun while it lasted, and you at least got to boot out the defending champs before you went. But did you have to lose to NEW YORK? *sigh*

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Do you remember the stop work order on the Petworth Eyesore? Well it seems the remodelers of the house have now obtained the right permits and scratched off the stop work sign.

I’d like to point out to them that no matter if there is a big bright red sticker on their front window or not, the house is still damn ugly, still an eyesore, and still not showing any decent signs of progress.

In fact, with a broken window, the house looks even more abandoned in mid-construction, perfect for the house-selling neighbour next door and perfect for a prominent corner in Petworth.

If only I could win the lottery and buy off that visual pollution.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

It’s that time of the year again, with all those construction workers making us think there’s been a popularity surge for the Village People. This time it’s a lane closure along Wilson Ave. that will tie up your traffic.

From the Arlington County Web site:

4200 Wilson Blvd. (at Ballston Mall entrance) between N. Stuart St. and N. Randolph St.:One of four lanes will be closed at a time beginning July 16 between the hours of 8:00pm and 5:00am to allow for the installation of a new pedestrian traffic signal. Anticipated completion date is July 20th. Work will be performed during off-peak hours to minimize the impact on traffic, to ensure pedestrian safety, and to avoid the need for detours. Area residents may experience an increase in noise levels during this time; however every effort will be made to keep the disruption at a minimum.

Traffic can be hairy anyway, so be sure to give yourself some extra time going through that area. And if you see a biker, Indian chief and sailor hanging out together, be sure to buy them a beer and keep them company. They’re just waiting for the construction project to be done so they can get back to the concert.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Spotted this afternoon on Independence Avenue SW. What kind of freaking idiot do you have to be to take your bike for a spin and not wear a helmet?

But helmets are required in all states surrounding the District, including the District itself. ALL riders, regardless of age, are required to wear safety helmets.

If you’re interested, here’s DC’s Helmet Restrictions, Virginia’s Helmet Restrictions, and Maryland’s Helmet Restrictions.

Personally, I think if you want to bike without your helmet, you ought to leave a bond on file with the state to cover your entire medical bill when you get hit and become a vegetable.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

God bless people with way, way, way too much time on their hands. Consumerist has found which hotels in DC are most frequently on the DC Madam’s telephone records. Turns out, all the perverts stay at Marriott, though Hyatt, Hilton and Holiday Inn put up good numbers, too.

Better yet, check out the google maps mashup they made to show you where all the perverts stayed near your place. So much Web 2.0 goodness here, I hardly know what to do with myself.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Most of the vanity plates I see are from Virginia, both because I do more driving out here and because it’s a cheaper thing to do here than in DC. But I caught this one (barely – sorry for the blur but not crashing is higher on my priority list than getting a good picture) today after realizing what it was as he zoomed by. I certainly hope he picked this because he amused himself with it and not because he thought the gene codes made it any less eye-rolling macho posturing.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Mayor Fenty this morning announced his intention for the city to appeal the recent loss to the Supreme Court, hoping to uphold the 30-year old ban on handguns in the city. The appeals court ruled in March that the ban was unconstitutional, and should be struck down. It wasn’t the final word, the Supreme Court remains in control of the fate of would-be handgun owners in DC.

DC’s ban on handguns is so strict, you cannot merely carry an assembled, unloaded firearm between rooms of your own home without being subject to the penalties put in place in the 1970s. Meanwhile, gun crimes in the District seem to range independent of the law, peaking back in the 1990s, with over 400 murders in a single year. The MPD doesn’t differentiate between murders with firearms versus murder by other means, and gun crime now is largely less than it was ten years ago, but since the law went into effect 30 years ago, other factors seem to be at play. Why continue to defend this unconstitutional law?

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

I’m pretty big on farmers markets. They’re common, they’re worthwhile, they’re tasty, and best of all: they’re totally local. You get produce grown and picked in the area, reducing your carbon footprint, and supporting local business. Saturday morning, we ended up grabbing two pints of blackberries, two pints of blueberries and two pints of cherries, which ended up going into a batch of white sangria on Sunday night.

Now is the prime season if you’re looking for peaches and nectarines, and of course blackberries will only be amazing for the next few weeks, but then we get raspberries….look behind the cut here for an awesome white sangria recipe.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs Continue reading →

….in the World Series of Pop Culture, duh! What, you don’t watch VH1, the channel that brings you the best half hour on television? Without VH1 we’d never have discovered the wonder that is Zarf!

Anyway, Baltimore-based team “Fragilay” (named after the Old Man’s assumption that his classy new leg-lamp came in from Italy) defeated the defending champs to make it into the second round. Other local team The Lucky Stars (which includes recent GW law grad Brad Hudgins) got bounced in round one, sadly, so we’re gonna have to root for B’more on tonight’s episode. Good luck, Sherits, Shalonda, and Tomi!

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Easterns Car Ads. Defense Contractor Metro Ads. Political Slogans everywhere you look. They’re all the heart of the DC Advertising Market. But then, on top of it all, there’s Matthew Lesko, whose trademark question-mark coat and wacky glasses have told us that there’s a ton of federal money just waiting for us, those are the crown jewel of DC’s ads.

Check out his latest, courtesy of the Post:

Nice to see he’s staying with the culture.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Yesterday, Tiffany brought you information about the David Albo Employment Act, which assesses serious fines over three years for various traffic infractions as part of the omnibus VA HB 3202 Roads bill. Today, the Post brings us the tale of the public backlash about it, including the grassroots efforts by several members of the VA Legislature who want to reconvene the legislature to change the law to affect only felony violations of traffic laws (which include DUI), and to include assessment of fines on all drives, not just those who bear VA Drivers Licenses.

The whole thing is honestly asinine, as in its current form, several misdemeanor offenses will trigger the fine, which is paid in three installments. In addition, the fines are only assessed by the VA DMV as part of the renewal of your car registration. Besides, let’s look at who this law really benefits, and that’s the DUI Defense Lawyers. With mandatory jail time for first time offenders and all manner of fines and fees, this is a place where the lawyers benefit from the number of people who will fight ticket after ticket to avoid paying that $1,050 fine. Bad law. Fix it, folks.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Smithsonian Metro, weekend afternoon
Guy in wheelchair, late middle age, long graying hair tied back, carrying a green ID with the word “guest” on it. Rolls up to me, showing the “guest” ID. “Excuse me, sir, my daughter and I are Katrina refugees and we need some help.” I tell him no, sorry, and he goes on to someone else.

Union Station Metro, Monday morning
“Hey man, change these to a twenty?” guy holds out a fistful of fives. Being too nice, and without pausing to wonder why a guy would want to change to a bigger bill, I hand him a loose twenty. He gives me the fives. There are, of course, only three bills. “Hey, hey,” I say loudly. He still holds the twenty in his hand, and I quickly grab it back and give him back his fives. “Dude, nice try,” I say with a smirk.

Mr. Fifteen sighs and grins back, “This town’s changed, man,” he says. “But I can tell you’re from around here.” Whatever that means.

Pentagon City Metro, weekend afternoon
It’s Katrina Refugee Wheelchair guy again. He passes by me, but instead of launching into the expected “my daughter and I are refugees” spiel, he simply says, “Can I have a dollar to get something to eat?” Pleased by this simple honesty, I give him a dollar.

Waterfront area near Safeway, weekday night
White guy, early 20s, spiky hair and earring, walks with a bit of swagger. “Excuse me, sir, I need some help. I’m from around here,” he points at a building behind the Safeway which I thought was abandoned, “and my Dad’s in Columbia, Maryland, and I just found out he’s very sick and might be dying. I’m out of cash but I need $20 to get on a bus to see him. Can you help out?”

I pause for a bit, smile, and say, “No.” Then I keep walking.

“NO?” he yells after me. You’d think he’d never been brushed off by a mark before. “Whaddaya mean ‘NO?!'”

“What, do I look like a tourist or something?” I toss back over my shoulder as I head for the Metro.

“Well, that’s real nice,” he calls from across the street. “GOD BLESS YOU, MAN.”

Same area, six months later
The same kid comes up to me in front of Safeway, this time carrying what looks like an empty gas can. “Excuse me, sir,” he starts, “I’m out of gas and I forgot my wallet, do you think you could-”

“Hi there!” I cry out to him, real friendly-like, “hey, how’s your Dad?”

“My…huh? Oh, my Dad, he’s uh-”

“Nice prop! A gas can! No, I’m not giving you anything!” But by now he is heading off to find another mark.

Capitol South Metro, Saturday morning
“I need some help, sir,” says the guy pacing the platform, “I just locked myself out of my car, and I need twenty dollars to-”

“No.”

“Aw c’mon man-”

“No.”

Union Station Metro, Monday afternoon

Guy pushing EIR in my face. “Want to help impeach Cheney and overthrow the British monarchy’s worldwide drug cartel?”

“Hey wow, so LaRouche is out of jail now?”

“Don’t believe everything you read on the Internet just because you can google LaRouche, man! I can google for brain surgery and find stuff, man! Haw haw haw!” (He seriously said that, then made a very fake sounding laugh.)

“No fascist demagoguery for me, please. Enjoy the cult.”

“LaRouche is the new FDR! Economic disaster is coming! Impeach Cheney and stop Gore’s global warming scam!” (Okay, he didn’t really say all that, it’s just the standard slogans sung or yelled from their card table shrines.)

Farragut North Metro, yesterday
It’s Katrina Refugee Wheelchair guy again. I recognize him but apparently he doesn’t recognize me. The spiel begins, “Sir, me and my daughter are Katrina refugees and we’ve been living in a FEMA trailer-”

“You’re still refugees?”

“Well, you know-”

“No. Play your grift elsewhere. Why are you at Farragut North, anyway? There are hardly any gullible tourists here.”

Katrina Refugee Wheelchair guy makes a face, then rolls off to some other mark.

(Someone out there, please tell me, am I being too mean? Somehow, I doubt a Katrina refugee with a daughter would insist on living around one of the most expensive cities in America, even to panhandle, so I lean more towards thinking of this guy as a fraudster.)

Seriously, I don’t know why I keep getting these guys. Are there just that many in DC, or do I just look like a real rube and an ideal mark? Thank goodness I watch LOST.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

All hail the internet. I didn’t get an attendee review of the GiraMondo events like I asked for but I got the next best thing – some clarification from the coordinator. Laurent Guinand commented on the post (I didn’t REALLY think there would be $7 cava, Laurent… allow me some poetic license) and listed off last year’s selection:

Prosecco Zardetto (Italy)
Gruet Rose (New Mexico)
Gloria Ferrer Blanc de Noir (Sonoma)
Champagne Nicolas Feuillate (France)
Ferrari Spumante Brut (Italy)
Champagne Veuve Clicquot Yellow Label (France)

(Mr Guinand clarified that this was a smaller selection and therefor a slightly lower admission price)

This year’s won’t be the same, but should be similar and a little larger. Okay, I’m convinced – I bought tickets five minutes ago and my darling girlfriend and I will be there on the 25th. See you then, Mr Guinand!

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

A Gate Crasher’s Change of Heart. Armed robber breaks into Capitol Hill home during a small summer party, points a gun at your 14 year old daughter’s head, and demands money. What do you do? What do you do?

Why, offer wine and cheese before ending with a group hug, of course. A taste of the Chateau Malescot St-Exupéry and Camembert, coupled with some good old-fashioned D.C. hospitality, and the would-be perp goes from Thug to Hug in ten minutes. Party guest Michael Rabdau described it as a “love fest”:

“I was definitely expecting there would be some kind of casualty. He was very aggressive at first; then it turned into a love fest. I don’t know what it was …. There was this degree of disbelief and terror at the same time,” Rabdau said. “Then it miraculously just changed. His whole emotional tone turned — like, we’re one big happy family now. I thought: Was it the wine? Was it the cheese?”

Bizarre story, happy ending. Hurrah for overcoming evil with good. I still hope they can find and arrest the guy, of course. Maybe he’ll get even more sweet lovin’ in Corrections.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

The Alexandria-Washington chapter of DeMolay International is having a car wash to raise money for the group. This is a good group of kids and an organization worthy of support, in my opinion.

When: Saturday, July 14th, 2007, 9-2
Where: Springfield Lodge #217 7001 Backlick Road, Springfield, VA
Cost: Donations accepted – you choose how much to give.

Here is some information on what DeMolay is, for those of you who are curious:

DeMolay is an organization dedicated to preparing young men to lead successful, happy, and productive lives. Basing its approach on timeless principles and practical, hands-on experience, DeMolay opens doors for young men aged 12 to 21 by developing the civic awareness, personal responsibility and leadership skills so vitally needed in society today. DeMolay combines this serious mission with a fun approach that builds important bonds of friendship among members in more than 1,000 chapters worldwide.

Come check it out, help the young folks there with their organization and get your car sudsied up. Everyone is a winner!

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs