Good Morning Mr. Mouse

Walking into my kitchen the other morning, I realized I had an overnight visitor, a mouse in the house.

Now I was not alarmed, and unlike Prince of Petworth, didn’t go out and get a cat, I did what any red-blooded American man did. I ignored it.

But when the clock-stopping hottie came in, I had another “Honey do..” on my list: “Honey, do kill them!” And so to Home Depot I went to buy my way to mouse-free living.

I bought every single mouse and rat killing weapon they sold. Traps classic and new, bait, poison, sticky pads, you name it, and deployed my mouse-killing arsenal throughout the house. Then I waited.

I waited for a snap or a squeal or some sign of death…

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With those ever so famous words of the Sex Pistols’ Johnny (Lydon) Rotten, you have a chance now to play the Redistricting Game courtesy of the USC Annenberg Center for Communication and the USC Game Innovation Lab.

I think this is an interesting exercise for the general public to understand how the system is now “gamed” for elections and keeping the incumbent in power. I remember just a few years ago when Texas had their own real-life redistricting game with now disgraced Tom DeLay and the Texas Legislature, even going as far as to play “Where In the World is Your Texas Caucus”? For those who care, it’s not too late for 2008 to consider, are we being cheated? (NPR Story)

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photo courtesy of Moby74

Adding to the “I can’t believe you haven’t commented on this” kind of list is the latest entry in the TSA’s ongoing War on Liquids. Odds are good you’ve seen some coverage of the ‘incident’ between a woman going through security at National Airport and the TSA who said she couldn’t take that sippy cup through – it had more than the magical three ounces of liquid in it. When she declined to simply surrender the cup she was told she’d have to go out and back through security again with it empty.

What makes this so sad is that it only became news when there was some kind of altercation as she was on her way out the exit hallway. The she-said they-said has actually escalated to the point where the TSA has put security camera footage on their website that they claim clearly proves the woman was the one in the wrong, not them. Sad, because this is about on the level of a security guard following a young black man around the record store for an hour then pointing to his losing his temper at the harassment as proof that he was right.

I’d like to see video on TSA’s website showing this woman waiting though the security line, passing through the metal detector and having her bags all fully screened and pronounced okay, then being told that she couldn’t just drink the water in the cup and keep on going – she’d have to go out and go through the whole process again. That might be more illuminating. Perhaps some supplementary material of a TSA expert explaining how her drinking the water on the spot is less secure than her stepping out, drinking the water, then going back through. Other than how it increases the wait time for people behind her.

Bonus points for explaining why the liquid would be allowed through if it was formula and not water and what capacity the TSA screeners have to distinguish formula from so-called hazardous liquid. My favorite fun fact is that “nursery water,” water with extra fluoride that is otherwise indistinguishable from tap water, is allowed through.

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Dupont Cherries

Thanks to Max, I now have the perfect photo to accompany an interesting sight at the intersection of 20th and M Streets NW – a fresh fruit vendor.

I am not talking mangos at a kiosk, I am talking about a full-fledged fruit vendor who only sells fresh fruit each day to hungry office workers.

I’ll have to ask him how business it compared to a hot dog or burrito stand, but no matter his income, I love the idea. We should all eat more fresh fruit when in season, like these tasty cherries that Max captured in Dupont.

I think I’ll even go look for a watermelon dessert right about now…

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The Orioles sent Sam Perlozzo packing today, as the Orioles were a lousy 1-8 on their latest homestand, complete with a 3 game sweep at the hands of the hapless Nationals. Perlozzo finishes a nearly two season stint with the O’s at (122-164), a percentage of around .427.

There’s talk of former Marlins Manager Joe Girardi taking the helm of the struggling O’s, though, it’s far from a sure thing. Personally, I can’t fathom why anyone would want to work with that management group, though the addition today of Andy McPhail, formerly of the Cubs, is a positive sign for the otherwise struggling birds.

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Did you forget Father’s Day? Well, it’s not too late to go get him something that says, “Thanks for teaching me to throw the football,” or, “Geez, Pop – you’re swell!”

Here is the perfect gift for the father who has nearly everything: a wig and mustache combo from Crown Wigs at 706 King St. in Alexandria. Dad will be speechless and will know the love runs deep when he tries on this wig and mustache combo and the ladies hang off him like a cheap suit.

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Timing. The key to relationships working out. The key to finding a good job. The key to getting pregnant (or not). The key to placing your bet on the roulette wheel to cash in 37 to 1. And in photography, being in the right place at the right time, like Pa-ya-so was for this shot. It’s almost like a pea, perched on top of an inverted golf tee…or something.

Speaking of moon shots, my dad just shipped me a telescope that he’s had in storage for years, as well as a camera adapter for my Canon 20D. If all goes well, be on the lookout for some sweet, sweet moon. Oh, and if you live in Dupont Circle, make sure to keep your shades pulled tight.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Large packages with coffee cup
for size reference

Tiny sandwich, huge box

I don’t typically go to La Madeleine. In fact, I have been to the location in Bethesda probably five times, each time stepping inside, getting the sense that my type didn’t belong there, and then leaving. I could never put my finger on what it was, but I never felt like I was welcome there. Too many stuffed shirts, maybe? Delicious-looking fancy desserts? An air of wealth and contempt? Sure, all these are reasons to stay away from such a place but having actually been a customer, I now have a new reason on top of these.

Normally I am not one to be so intimidated so I decided today that I would stick it out and get a bite for breakfast. $8.38 later and I had a croissant with egg and cheese and a cup of coffee. Apparently they only have one size cup. It was giant – about 20 ounces.

The nice young lady who took my order handed me a bag that looked like it could have been filled with a week’s worth of groceries. I looked inside and found a large plastic container that looked like it might hold enough food to gorge myself on until I purged. I opened the plastic box and found that only about a quarter of the space contained actual food.

A comment on the food – it was good but not $8 worth of good. It was more of a $4 meal. The sandwich was tasty and had sliced tomatoes, which were nice although I had not requested them. Overall, the food met my expectations for a breakfast on the way to work.

In the end, I am still pretty sure that my type doesn’t belong at La Madeleine. Not because of the obvious difference in wealth and self-perceived importance but because of the obvious difference in beliefs about conservation and being a good environmental steward. La Madeleine is a hotbed of waste and over packaging. Thanks, but I will not be back. Not even for an overpriced tasty pastry.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

While briefly surfing washingtonpost.com while eating, I noticed an article labeled “Think Outside the Box : Boxed wine is making a comeback — but is it drinkable? We put six brands to the test. ” I’m a beer drinker who the nuances of wine are largely lost on, but technological innovation and marketing interest me, so I opened the article. What a waste of my time.

Writer Dave McIntyre talks about six boxed wine options but I see no reason to bother considering what he has to say. After an opening paragraph that makes little sense – somehow equating boxed wine with stealing your parents’ alcohol from the fridge – he launches into this paragraph.

Yet wine in a box has some advantages: A three-liter carton takes the space of two bottles but offers the buzz of four. Smaller boxes offer possibilities for covert sipping in places where alcohol might be frowned upon. Boxes fit neatly into a picnic basket and won’t break on a patio or pool deck. And they are cheaper than bottles and corks, so the winery can pass that savings on to you.

Of the four possible reasons Mr McIntyre thinks you might want boxed wine, one is quantity of “buzz” and the other is drinking on the sly. If the standard we’re going to be talking about here is how ripped you can get, doooooooood, then why bother to talk about taste? Why not just print the alcohol content percentages, my man? You’ve clearly already made up your mind about this test and the possible outcomes.

The best bit, though? The opening of the following paragraph.

Despite these conveniences, the stigma remains.

Gosh, I wonder how those stigmas keep getting perpetuated, Dave?

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Floyd, you are now an asshat. Congratulations. Your parents must be proud of such an asshat as you.

Graffiti found in the head at Dr. Dremo’s at 2001 Clarendon Blvd. in Arlington.

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Do you remember last week when we witnessed Hummers mating? Were you shocked that anyone would need not just one, but two Hummers in their life?

Well hold on to your CAFE because now we have another insult to the atmosphere: the stretch Hummer!

I don’t know about you, but I find this a monstrosity that should be taken out back and shot before it global warms us any more.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Booze and Teenage Stupidity is what’s to blame for the deaths of four girls from Northern Virginia. Couple of ’em got drunk, and drove right in front of a semi, which promptly killed pretty much everyone in the car. Turned the guy who drove the truck, a Special Forces Vet, into a mess, much as you’d expect. Why? Because right after graduation, they wanted to get trashed to celebrate.

The news has been maudlin, as you might expect, over the loss of four young lives. I’m just amazed at all the people that aren’t more disappointed to find out they threw their lives away to get hammered and drive drunk. Quite frankly, that’s Darwin in action, no matter what the news will say.

I fully expect to get a lot of negative comments, possibly from people talking about the kids themselves and how they knew them personally. I’m sure they were good people. They just threw their lives away in pursuit of some booze. Pity, isn’t it?

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Watch out where you park your car on Sunday. If you don’t want your hooptie hauled by Arlington’s finest, best heed this traffic warning:

The Arlington County Police Department will close two streets on Sunday, June 17, 2007, for the Columbia Pike Blues Festival. Listed below are the streets that will be affected.

From 8:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m.:

• Walter Reed Drive will be closed from Columbia Pike to S. 9th Street.
• S. 9th Road will be closed from S. Garfield Street to Walter Reed Drive.

In addition, motorists should be on the lookout for temporary “No Parking” signs in the area. Illegally parked vehicles may be ticketed or towed. If your vehicle is towed from a public street, call 703-228-4252.

The festival runs from noon to 6 p.m. on Sunday. For more information visit www.columbiapikepartnership.com.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Running some errands which required me to walk from Georgetown to Dupont Circle and back again (because the whole Metro to Foggy Bottom to Metro Center to Dupont route is just too circuitous to bother, even without considering the walk between Georgetown and Foggy Bottom) I was pleasantly surprised to discover “Rose Park,” a path between P and M Streets that runs atop the west slope of the Rock Creek Parkway, bordered by grassy fields and playgrounds. Not only does the Rose Park path make for a pleasantly idyllic meander, I found it a startlingly quick shortcut to get between the Dupont Circle area and lower Georgetown on foot while avoiding downtown noise and traffic.

Coming from Dupont Circle, you can find the entry to Rose Park by walking west on 21st P Street NW about five blocks till you cross the bridge over the Parkway, just after Florida Ave. After crossing the onramp, the asphalted path is clearly visible cutting southwest across a flat green field.

Coming from Georgetown, you can turn left onto Rose Park from M Street NW after 28th, through the trees just short of the bridge to Downtown/Foggy Bottom.

The area on Google Maps. Rose Park is, of course, just a tiny, tiny segment of the whole Rock Creek Park experience. I invite readers to leave comments as to where else we car-less, walk-loving DC residents can go along the Park grounds for bucolic, easily reachable shortcuts and hikes.

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I asked our waitress at the Ballston Rock Bottom Brewery if she knew anything about canonization of saints in the Catholic Church. She said she didn’t, although we agreed that probably death was involved and we were pretty sure that the person had to perform some sort of miracle.

Later on, Mary assisted my lovely wife and me with the mysterious disappearance of my wife’s Mug Club card – that precious card on which they tally up the number of beers you have had and give you such prizes as pint glasses, hats and a free trip to a liver specialist after 300 beers. I am getting there but still have a few more to go.

Then Mary did the impossible. She looked up my wife’s information in the computer, added one beer to the total and presented her with a new card. There was a blinding light and a choir of angels as the new card, in spirit the same as the old one freshly raised from its grave, slipped into my wife’s wallet. So let it be written. So let it be done.

Thanks, Mary, for a wonderful experience this evening at Rock Bottom Brewery. And although you won’t need it, I’ll put in a good word for you with the Big G, should I reach the pearly gates before you do.

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Photo by DC Metroblogger

DC police are out in force today with Click It or Ticket, their program to get motorists to buckle their seat belts when driving.

I watched this MPD officer stop both the Porche and the Honda at an 18th and M street intersection in one stop light.

While the buckle up lesson learned was not cheap or quick for either driver, let this post be your fast and free DC Metblogs warning: click it or ticket.

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I was minding my own business, chowing down at Chipotle on Connecticut, when all of a sudden a crazy-eyed, old man burst through the door shouting, “Great Scott! Marty is going before congress in the year 2021 to ask for Parkinson’s research money! I must travel to the future to prevent Jenna Bush from being elected and vetoing the stem cell bill! Quick! Someone give me a bottle of vodka, and I’ll need your leftover meals for the flux capacitor!”

I parted with my carnitas burrito, but there was no way I was giving up my guacamole. A guy has his priorities.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Another broken meter, another broken heart. This meter has hardened its heart and refuses to take more money. We all must learn that another’s inability to receive love should not impact our ability and desire to give it, as much as it hurts to not have it returned. The love is there, regardless.

Broken – won’t take more than it arbitrarily decides on a given day. My dollars pile up as it takes a quarter here, a quarter there. The coffers of my heart overflow with love, money and sadness.

Yours always,
Money Man

To the person who left this note and parked in the spot despite the many other available spots with working meters: Did your note, detailing the sorrow you felt actually save you from getting a ticket? Please let us know because if it means saving a buck or two I can write letters like that all day long.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs