Well, it looks like all but a done deal – DC United is going to head over into Maryland’s PG County because they want someone to build them a new stadium. I only have two suggestions: forget this horse-hockey about keeping the name – you’re not welcome to it. You want to be DC United, be in DC. The Nationals aren’t called the grod-damned Montreal Expos anymore because they’re not in Montreal. You won’t be in DC either, so be honest about it.
Second, enjoy your new digs and the quality law enforcement. I’d suggest you don’t host any Bring Your Dog To Work days, and if any of your fans get picked up and throw in jail for drunk and disorderly I’d suggest making sure they’ve paid up their season tickets in advance; might be hard to collect from them later.