courtesy of ‘philliefan99’
Independence Day is rapidly approaching, and you know what that means: Fireworks. Oh, the fireworks. But, as anyone who’s lived in a dry climate can tell you, fireworks need a few things: adult supervision, some precautions, and good fireworks. You don’t want black market fireworks if you want to keep your house from burning down. DCRA is here to help you identify legal places in DC to buy fireworks, so click on through for the sweet Google map.
View 2010 Licensed DC Firework Stands in a larger map
Don’t be the jerk that buys fireworks from some superstore on the border of Pennsylvania and accidentally burns down his house or blows off his hand just because you’re all excited about lighting things on fire, okay? Let the pros handle the big explosions, and keep your own shows to a minimum.
Don’t you tell me what to do, you commuterrorist. I’m gon blow shit UP!! And punch me some limey bastards (who we all know have it common 365, but Independence Day’s the one time it’s legal).
July 4’s usually the one day I’m actually proud to be an American (up yours Lee Greenwood). I will get drunk enough to fight anyone (or any parked car, for that matter) who tries to bring me down on that day with their ‘rules’ and ‘safety concerns.’ You can’t inspect my bag, but you can inspect my sac… if you follow. I reserve the right to blow off any digit or appendage that has become vestigial because of my patriotism.
I bet you wrote that post with all of your fingers– I didn’t… just two… the middle ones!
USA! USA! USA!
(seriously, though, I get geeeeeeked for July Fourth)