Crazy Beltway Sex at 85mph leads to car crash, claims cabbie

Photo courtesy of
‘Jaguar E-Type 4.2 at Samuel’s in Allston: View from the driver’s seat’
courtesy of ‘Chris Devers’

“Stickshifts and Safetybelts, bucket seats have all got to go, because when I’m driving, in the car, it makes my baby seem so far.” – Cake, “Stickshifts and Safetybelts”

Tom Jackman of the Post has the highlights for this one, but here’s the summary: A cabbie is suing a Woodbridge man for an accident that wrecked his cab.

The defendant is claimed to have been driving at 85mph on the Beltway in Fairfax, intoxicated, whilst having relations with another occupant of the vehicle, which caused the car accidents.

There are a couple problems here that make me doubt the veracity of the cabbie’s claim:

  1. Since the introduction of bucket seats, the sheer amount of contortion necessary to get two people, let alone two people in flagrante delicto in the single front seat of a car is pretty much impossible.
  2. I mean, I know there are exhibitionists, but there was apparently another dude in the car at the same time, and that can usually have a negative effect on that situation, especially coupled with alcohol.
  3. Even at night 85mph on the western side of the beltway is pretty crazy, what with the closures and the construction etc.

So, I’m going to say this is pretty bogus. The judge tossed out the punitive damages part of the suit, so it’ll just be a $75,000 suit.  Trial starts next week.

You can bet we’ll be watching for this one.

I live and work in the District of Columbia. I write at We Love DC, a blog I helped start, I work at Technolutionary, a company I helped start, and I’m happy doing both. I enjoy watching baseball, cooking, and gardening. I grow a mean pepper, keep a clean scorebook, and wash the dishes when I’m done. Read Why I Love DC.

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