Psycho-Monkey Mom Alert in Montgomery County

monkey lady

Have you heard about the Montgomery County “Monkey Woman”, Elyse Gazewitz, who is fighting to free her monkey, Armani, from county banishment?

While I don’t care if the powers at be say that Armani is illegal and seized him for extradition to an animal sanctuary “where a monkey can live as a monkey,” what strikes me as odd about this whole situation is Gazewitz’s commitment to her capuchin monkey man:

Gazewitz said she had made preparations this week for a homecoming, stocking up on Armani’s favorite bananas and apples. She has left his room — she built a $4,000 addition onto her home just for him, she said — untouched since he was seized.

Waiting for him are a little hammock, tire swings and infant toys. She also has his Huggies diapers (with holes cut out for his tail), his Osh Kosh B’Gosh outfits and baby bottles ready to go. “I have his little Tigger on my bed, and I have the little baby blanket that he loves,” Gazewitz said.

Pet owners, dog people, cat people, even guppy Dad’s, what do you think about that commitment to an animal, “wild” or not? I say its freaky-deeky.

To build a whole house addition with all the accruements mentioned, is a huge sign of addiction beyond the normal cat lady eccentrics or doggy mansion overbuilds. That says this lady is thinking monkey = child and going all gonzo over a primate.

That no matter what the Animal Matters Hearing Board says, maybe its best that Elyse Gazewitz be separated from her “little boy” and seek counseling for psycho-level anthropomorphism.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Married, mortgaged, and soon to be a father, Wayan Vota is in the fast lane to mid-life respectability – until the day his brood finds his intimate journal of global traveling and curses him with the ever-eternal reply “I’m gonna be just like you, Dad!”

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