Today on my lunch break, I swam through the Reston humidity over to the closest CVS to pick up some Corn Flakes, Q Tips, and light bulbs. As I rounded the first aid isle, I couldn’t believe my eyes: a wine section! How could this be? Were my eyes playing tricks on me? Was this some sort of Virginia hillbilly law that’s been around since the civil war? Was this some sort of joke? Had the heat and humidity finally given me slight brain damage?
No, no, no, and no. It was as real as a stripper’s breasts are fake. I decided to take advantage of this oddity so I asked the cashier up front, “Excuse me dear sir. Could I please speak to your sommelier? I’m interested in picking out a fine wine to go with my turkey sandwich.” It turns out that CVS doesn’t employ sommeliers, but the cashier assured me that the 2006 vintage of the Turning Leaf table wine was exquisite. He also recommended the 2007 Yellow Tail Merlot.
Needless to say, I opted for a chilled Hawaiian Punch instead.
This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs