Photo from Bravo TV
So how’s everybody’s Top Chef DC fantasy team? With Kenny’s departure I bet a lot of fans are missing one of the stronger chefs of the season. Of course I know nobody is out there playing Fantasy Top Chef but it’s almost Football season. I can’t help thinking about fantasy sports!
But I will say this- so far into the season it’s looking like that it’s not just not Angelo who has a chance to win it all. Tiffany, Ed, Amanda, and even Kevin have shown that they could stick around long enough to make it to the end.
Of course the one name I didn’t mention was Alex. Nobody likes Alex. The chefs think he’s sloppy, inexperienced, and unrefined; the audience thinks he’s a cheating thief; and he’s lucky that his team won restaurant wars last week or else he’d be gone by now.
Will this be the week Alex finally gets the boot? Here’s my running diary.
10:02: The Alex hate from the recap continues. Kevin is whaling on Alex while Amanda is spilling coffee in the back patio.
10:03: Wiley Dufresne of WD-50 and Top Chef Masters is guest judging and has brought some crazy black boxes of mystery. The quickfire challenge is to cook with the mystery ingredient as well as additional mystery ingredients that will be unvieled throughout the challenge. A really great idea and I have to say the past couple of quickfires have been really neat to watch.
10:04: The prize for winning? $10,000. Angelo would love the cash for his Russian mail order bride girlfriend. Angelo has a Russian girlfriend? Man I was way off base with him…
10:05: Mystery Box #1? Bass, Fava Beans, Hominy. Alex realizes nobody likes him and it’s true. Nobody will even give him a can opener.
10:06: Alex & Angelo looks lost. Angelo doesn’t know what to cook while Alex is just lost as he rambles on about stuff and we can tell nobody is home. Mystery Box #2: squid & black garlic.
10:07: Mystery Box #3: Ramps & Passion Fruit. Ed goes WTF! I go: what the hell is black garlic?
10:09: “Alex + Quickfire = Bottom.” Truer words have never been said.
10:11: Alex, Amanda end up on the bottom while Kevin and Tiffany end up at the top. Tiffany wins the challenge and the $10K. She now has $20K towards her wedding. Think about how balling her nuptials will be. I wonder if Ed will be invited.
10:16: CIA Challenge: take a classic dish and disguise it. A great challenge but the presentation is kinda hokey. However the opportunity to serve a meal at CIA and the grand prize trip to Paris makes up for it.
10:18: We find out why Alex isn’t that great of a chef. He is a convert from his previous gig filming weddings, bar mitzvahs, and any other special occasion. Maybe he should of stuck with his day job.
10:21: Kelly isn’t listening to Alex’s advice: no surprise. However there is one fan of Alex among the chefs: Amanda. It makes sense that the most annoying contestants stick together.
10:22: I could care less about your spy names. Clearly a task egged on by the producers.
10:27: Like OMG We are at the CIA! The chefs know they are in a super-secret location because of all the security screenings they had to go through. Not really anything special when you take in account that just about any government building in the area requires searches and stuff.
10:31: Kelly overcooks her rice and freaks out. She’s used to high-altitude cooking where rice cooks faster. I didn’t know rice cooks faster at higher elevations and usually when I cook rice I undercook it. I’m a bad Asian I don’t even know how to cook rice correctly. Tiffany however comes to the rescue, she wins sportsmanship points by helping Kelly cook a new batch of rice and plate her food.
10:32: CIA Director Leon Panetta says it’s a first atthe CIA to disguise the food- I’m sure they are busy disugising everything else.
10:35: The director receives an ominous note and has to excuse himself from the rest of the meal. Sounds like something is blowing up in the middle east or perhaps it was one of those fake texts that girls arrange to get out of a bad date.
10:36: Amanda says Alex is like the wise old Jewish uncle. He maybe Jewish but I doubt he’s very wise.
10:40: Can we talk about the fact Amanda disguised French Onion Soup by making French Onion Soup? At least Ed tried to disguise Chicken Cordon Bleu by flipping it inside out.
10:49: Tiffany is the big winner of the challenge and now has a honeymoon to go along with her wedding money. Good for Top Chef to finance a contestant’s entire wedding. Ed also made the top and says his girlfriend will be mad they didn’t win the trip. Really? This ain’t no live show Ed. You’re watching this months later.
10:51: Angelo and Alex are among the bottom. Angelo is called out on using frozen puff pastry and with that I learn my second tip of winning Top Chef: never ever use frozen puff pastry. Also never ever make dessert.
10:53: Angelo says he deserves to go home but I’d like to see him stick around. Who else am I going to make snarky comments about? We all know Alex is going to go home, but are the producers going to blow things up by sending Angelo home instead?
11:58: Nope. Alex is sent home packing. It’s about time. I never want to hear the words pea puree ever again.