Keepsake Marriage Certificate

Originally uploaded by tjbax.

It’s not that I want to bombard you guys with wedding stuff, but this surprised me and I had to share.

Tom and I went down to the Arlington County Courthouse this week to get our marriage license, and then headed out to open a joint bank account. I took the whole morning off work, expecting a bunch of bureaucracy at the County Clerk’s office. We checked the website and ensured all our ducks were in a row- we filled out the application, we had cash, we had IDs.

The whole process took 15 minutes, including the time it took to walk from my car, get through the metal detector, and get upstairs.

Contrast, on the other hand, to the hour-long interrogation and ordeal at the bank while trying to open a joint bank account. Two forms of ID each, multiple repetitions of our social security numbers, employers, work telephone numbers, signatures, blah blah blah.

So remember kids, in Arlington County, the paperwork for a lifetime commitment takes 15 minutes, but the paperwork to let someone hold your money for you takes 4 times as long.

And by the way, shown here is the “keepsake” certificate that is presented to the bride and groom the day of the wedding (as opposed to the official marriage register that’s sent back to the county). It’s ugly as sin. And that line at the bottom? “THIS IS NOT A CERTIFIED CERTIFICATE.” How romantical.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Tiffany Baxendell Bridge is an Internet enthusiast and an incurable smartass. When not heckling the neighborhood political scene on Twitter, she can be found goofing off with her ukulele, Bollywood dancing, or obsessing about cult TV. She is That Woman With the Baby In the Bar.

Tiffany lives in Brookland with her husband Tom, son Charlie, and two high-maintenance cats. Read why Tiffany loves DC.

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