Photo by DC Metroblogger

Dad, I wanna paddle!

No, I wanna paddle, you paddled on the way up here.

Okay kids, stop fighting, you both can paddle.

Wait, what about me, Dad? Can I drop the rock anchor?

No, little miss, let your brothers paddle. You navigate.

I what?

Just tell the boys to paddle downstream, that way.

Okay, but they’re making us go in circles.

Don’t worry, we’ll be going downstream anyway.

Paddle yourself these beautiful fall days at The Boathouse at Fletcher’s Cove. Open till the end of October

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

In my day-to-day work I have found myself at some of the more elite private schools in the DC area and, in working with the students, have found that one trend among private schools nowadays is to have few rules and to allow the kids to call the teachers by their first names.

Okay – the name thing could be cool and can really help establish a great rapport between students and teachers. This could be really powerful if the teachers kept their spots as authority figures but more often than not what I see is a buddy-buddy relationship. These are the same schools that allow the students to more or less do what they want and go to class or not, depending on their moods and how they feel at the moment. And the kids pretty much run wild, show little respect or even good manners to outsiders like me who are there to do a service for them. It looks more like indoor recess than like classtime.

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There’s not a lot to say about this Virginia plate, spotted on Route 1 during rush hour tonight, other than the guy driving it was a real douchebag. The subwoofers on his tiny Civic were rattling his plastic, windows down. He caught me taking the photo and nearly caused an accident to pull up next to my car, demanding to know what I was taking a photo of.

“Your bumper sticker, it’s hilarious.”

Nice to know it’s funny because it’s true…

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Photo by DC Metroblogger

Location: 15th Street and Pennsylvania Avenue, right outside what used to be Riggs Bank

When I see a utility box like this, open and exposed to all, I have an odd urge to flip some switches.

I haven’t of course, I don’t wanna get shot by the trigger-happy Secret Service at the White House next door, but this is a temptation.

Back in Russia, I had an odd red button on the wall that said “Stop : Moscow”. I never did press it, thinking the whole city would stop, but I often wondered.

Have you ever succumbed to the urge? Ever flipped a switch like this just to see what happened? I think this one might change lights or it might change lives.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Crouching Meter, Hidden Parking Ticket

Originally uploaded by tbridge.

Spotted on Wilson Blvd in Arlington near Whitlow’s today. If you can’t spy the meter, you’re not the only one. The meter, hidden amongst the newspaper boxes, was cause for a ticket when I walked by. The driver of the beamer snatched the ticket angrily from their windshield and sped off into traffic.

Sorry man, tough cookies.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

photo courtesy of NeilGaiman.com

… they’ve moved the event to a larger venue since interest has been so high.

I’m so getting hatemail from Sandman fans… Please stop throwing your lit clove cigarettes at me!

If you’re interested in hearing the most excellent Mr Gaiman speak, or want to get some of your books by him autographed, the new venue for this Friday evening at 7pm is just three blocks down the from Politics&Prose. I presume this is primarily a promotional tour for his book “Fragile Things” which will street in October so expect to hear him read some material you haven’t heard before.

Wesley United Methodist Church
5312 Connecticut Avenue NW
Washington, DC 20008

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Photo by DC Metroblogger

The caption to this photo was going to be something cheeky about how DC MPD can arrogantly park in front of fire hydrants, while if us mere residents did, we’d get tickets.

I was gonna say that even in my most crazy parking days, when I would wedge my car into a spot with 24 bummer taps, or park with a wheel on the curb to make a space, I never, ever would block a fire hydrant. It just isn’t cool or right.

Then as I took this photo and started to compose a post on my joe-cool Nokia 6682, up came a DC MPD Sergeant who asked me what was wrong – why I was taking a photo of the cop car?

When I explained that I was taking a photo because the police cruiser was parked in front of the fire hydrant, an amazing thing happened. The sergeant got mad.

Not at me, but at the poor-parking officer. The sergeant immediately went about tracking the officer down. As I walked away, a shocked and embarrassed policeman passed me at a trot, his Ben’s Chilli Bowl half-smoke half-eaten and dripping sauce as he ran.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Falling leaves? Cold winds? New television programming? No. Calendar kiosks everywhere are the sign of fall truly being upon us. Every year the pestilence falls upon us all, eager to tempt us with cute puppies, kittens, lighthouses, Hooters waitresses, scenic vistas of faraway places we hope we’ll get to next year. All of it predicated on your forgetting that come January 20th every damned thing there will be half off.

Resist! Resist, I say! Stop and oogle the oiled-up pictures of people with better genes and more time to spend in the gym than yourself, if you must. But don’t spend! Don’t encourage this cancer that kills trees and entreats you to just HANG IN THERE with it’s cutsie-wootsie widdle snookums-pudding kitty.

Unless you need a Christmas gift for dad, that is. Because jeez, what the hell else are you going to buy the old man this year?

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Photo by DC Metroblogger

While I’m not known for my tag recognition abilities, that would be for Tom, Don and Mik to duel over, I do sometimes wonder about them.

Like this license plate seen on K Street today. What might this mean? “UZMELRD”? My guesses: You’ze Mellerd? Use Mel Road? Use Metal Rods?

Yeah, I’m clueless. Anyone have one they can spare me?

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Tom pointed out to me this morning that there didn’t seem to be a single bit of mainstream media news about Friday night’s Crystal City armed standoff. This isn’t 100% true – it made the 11pm channel 4 news that night, but there’s no sign of it on NBC4.com Similarly there’s no mention on washingtonpost.com that I can find either.

This amazes me. About a quarter-mile of street was shut down for about four hours on Friday, over a dozen machine-gun toting S.W.A.T. officers and who knows how many cops were in attendance and the whole thing concluded with gunfire, albeit a tactical non-fatal (we think!) shot from a police sniper.

And if you weren’t there or don’t know someone who was… it may as well have not even happened.

As someone who’s a dyed-in-the-wool skeptic, if I read an allegation of anything less obvious than “the sun came up this morning” on the web and it’s not corroborated anywhere else I just assume it’s baloney. By my own standard, none of you should believe what I wrote. So this leaves me bordering on shaken – our paper of record makes no mention of an incident this high-profile? What else happens around town that we don’t hear about?

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

I’ve never played around with infrared photography (and probably never will), but every once in a while I see a shot that looks amazing. The usual effect of taking an infrared shot is that the trees and grass turn white and it looks like you just stepped through the wrong peep hole in wonderland (time to lay off the acid). You can of course achieve this same effect using the magic wizardry of Photoshop, but it’s never quite the same in my opinion.

The composition and exposure of this shot are amazing and will give each viewer a different emotion or feeling I’m sure. For me, I feel like I’m watching a David Lynch movie and that there might be a severed ear hiding in one of the bushes. Cue the Radiohead and start floating across the sky. Maybe it’s just Monday and the new Zero 7 CD is putting me in one of those moods….

Anyway, nice work Mr Speedy Delivery. May the shrooms be with you.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Hummer with Sat

Originally uploaded by tbridge.

I came out of the Clarendom Metro on Friday morning, on the way to my office away from home, when I spotted this wonder. It’s a Hummer H3, complete with a satellite dish mounted to the cargo rack. Took me a second to figure out why I’d see such a thing, until I saw all the suits standing around and more coming out of the building on Wilson Blvd that used to be a lot less quiet and less surrounded by machine-gun-toting security guards.

I snapped a picture, and here’s to hoping I don’t have a phone call from the nice people at the NSA…

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

You know you check them. You know, every so often, you can’t resist looking. You check the Washington City Paper’s “I Saw You” column in its Matches section. You may even browse the cornucopia of Craig’s List “Missed Connections“.

I’d admit that I do, especially after a chance encounter with a potential supermodel. Of course, like you I always strike out. Well that was until today.

Finishing Savage Love in this week’s Washington City Paper, I glanced at the I Saw You column and the very first ad caught my eye: Heller’s Bakery in Mt. Pleasant. Interesting. I go there often, almost weekly, and I wondered who was making the mack in my local bakery.

Reading the ad, last weekend came back in a flash – the anger the frustration, the loss of my keys at Heller’s. And then, recognizing the ad was about me, my hopes were dashed yet again. This is an “I’m Sorry” not a “Hey Baby” ad:

Yes, I have my keys now. I picked them up later on Sunday from Heller’s when I bought another gingerbread man.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Okay, probably not what they meant by Fall for the Book but how do you pun about a pun? This Wednesday kicks off the eight day event at noon and follows it up with a smorgasbord of events.

You can’t start a festival on a campus without drumming poets of course (no official word on clove cigarettes but I’m putting my bet down on yes) but the rest of the day runs the gamut from “Poetry On Demand booth – original verses in a matter of minutes” to reduced Shakespeare to an evening book tour appearance from Deborah Tannen explaning why yet another two groups of people don’t understand a damned thing each other is saying.

It looks like an interesting assortment of events, look and see if something else calls out to you.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

“Jenn, you never write about Fashion and Fantasy Shopping anymore! What gives? We want the glamour back!!”

I hear you, moved and seconded. So I’m inaugurating what I hope will be my continuing series on, yes, what Washington is wearing. Here’s the first installation, enjoy!

Sitting in Darpino’s Nemesis Maul, a.k.a the Fashion Centre at Pentagon City, resting from a whirlwind Necessity Shopping Tour to outfit myself for a new job. As I sip my deadly mocha, my eyes wander about the crowd and I’m surprised to see some pretty daring fashion choices.

Sauntering by is a girl in a lovely printed kimono dress worn with capri tights and ballet flats. Sure, I wore that same outfit in high school, but I love seeing the art student/model look return. Next down the food court runway is a super skinny girl in super skinny jeans, worn with low leg warmers and metallic flats. Another retro look that could be ridiculous, but Miss Legs pulled it off today. Two fetching Grace Kellys pass by in tailored shirts with sweater vests, pencil skirts and skimmers. Suddenly an impossibly daring all-green ensemble of embroidered cardigan, corduroy flared skirt and slouchy boots meanders purposefully through the crowd.

Ok, it’s not all glamour here – I’m still seeing lots of baggy ghetto wear, track suits with names on the posterior, white nylons with open-toed pumps. But, seeing three looks out of September Vogue in three minutes is a good sign!

And what am I wearing for my shopping expedition? Flounced dress, crocheted sweater, riding boots (so last season). What will I be wearing for fall? I like to think of it as my Katharine Hepburn Goes to Paris look – wide-legged pants (cuffed, natch), delicate lightweight blouses, sweater vests, lots of dramatic flapper slouching.

What do you see Washington wearing?

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Photo by DC Metroblogger

And there goes a motorcade through Rock Creek Park.

Not sure which diplomat that was but he got the full Presidental treatment, including the chase ambulance.

I was only sad it wasn’t Bush out for a afternoon run.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Photo by DC Metroblogger

This is the sign that used to be at the intersection of 15th and I Streets NW, if you were on 15th Street going north.

Can you figure out which lane does what?

Now that the sign is gone, every morning I watch motorists trying to figure out which lane goes where, in real time, to the honks and shouts of those practiced in the art of the one way to one way navigation.

I’m only sad that when the sign fell, I didn’t have a car and couldn’t convince any of my friends who did have cars, to help me take it.

At least then I’d know where the needed sign went.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Oh it is so close I can taste it. I can smell the cig free air and the smoke free cloths, feel the phlegm free lungs.

In only 100 days, we will be Smoke Free DC. Only 14 more weekends of ashtrays indoors, of stinky clothes, of deadly air.

Then we can breathe deeply, we can sing loudly, we can be Smoke Free DC.

Join me in the 100 days countdown, in the 100 days celebration, in the 100 days till lung-cleansing freedom!

Smoke Free DC – not a day too soon.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Remember last week when a crack addict crashed his SUV through the Capitol Building security perimeter and then ran into the Capitol Building? Well its seems he wasn’t actually caught by the Capitol Police.

Carlos Greene was caught by the Flag Corps.

Yes, you read that right, those high school rejects, they weren’t even cool at band camp, are the heroes of the day. To quote the Washington Post:

Greene burst into the Flag Office and grabbed the supervisor, Karen Livingston, demanding to know how he could get out. She broke away and a burly male co-worker corralled the intruder. Capitol Police arrived seconds later and made the arrest.

Wow! So a police force the size of Cleveland’s, with 1,600 officers, had to rely on Flag Corps basement workers to protect the Captiol.

I feel safer already.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs

Long-time sufferers readers have read both Wayan and Stacey‘s takes on the ‘puffer’ explosives detectors in place in our airports, so I thought I’d point out the Post’s story that the machines are apparently headed for the great scrap-heap in the sky, victims of the War on Liquids and their tendency to get clogged up with all the dust and cruft floating around a busy airport.

Color me shocked that a machine designed to ‘sniff’ might need its filters cleaned more often than our crack TSA security is prepared to do.

This post appeared in its original form at DC Metblogs