‘an optic volcano’
courtesy of ‘katherine_hitt’

If you’re a fellow gen-xer and were at all into odd music during your youth then you’d probably recognize The Residents‘ signature eyeball motif. I honestly hadn’t thought of them in years, despite having really enjoyed Meet the Residents. However the almighty wikipedia indicates they’ve never really stopped creating, and now they’re coming to the 930 Club on Feb 7th of next year. I’m somewhat surprised by the venue, given that when Negativland came through two years ago they only rated the under 100 seat Warehouse.

‘The Cell’
courtesy of ‘andertho’

Alleged bank robber Kelvin James Crosby, 28, of High Point North Carolina was pinched in our fair city during a traffic stop. We’ll be sending him back to NC to stand trial for a bank robbery, during which he is reported by police to have dropped a personal document with his name on it. After finding this document, police compared a picture of Crosby to the surveillance tape and decided that was a good enough match to justify putting a warrant out for his arrest.

I’d like to think that if I was going to go stick up a joint I’d avoid carrying around my bills and love letters, but perhaps it was a spur of the moment kind of thing inspired by this bit of mail that drove him to it. You can insert your own lobbyist/congress crooks-coming-to-DC joke here.

‘National Press Club – Bottoms Up – 1-30-09’
courtesy of ‘mosley.brian’

I’m still waiting for my invitation to join the National Press Club, but they’re opening their doors to any and all tomorrow evening. Three of the writers and editors from America’s Finest News Source, The Onion, will be there to talk and flog their new book, Our Front Pages. I’ve heard some of these folks doing their shtick on the radio recently and they’re as pithy and funny live as they are in print. The event’s no charge but the same can’t be said of the bar afterward – it’s pay as you go. It’s understandable – you’d never get journalists to leave an open bar.

‘My Trusty Gavel’
courtesy of ‘steakpinball’

Yesterday’s council vote on the gay marriage bill was after what’s known as the first reading of the bill, and it’s only the first of two necessary before the matter goes to the mayor for a signature. The Post and others have specifically mentioned that, to their credit.

However they keep flubbing one minor point: while the rules require that the second reading happen no sooner than 14 days later, that’s contingent on their being a meeting then. According to Michael Battle, legislative assistant to Phil Mendelson, the laws have to pass at a legislative meeting and the regularly scheduled one isn’t till the new year. “Traditionally,” Battle said, “the Council has an additional meeting in December.  It has not yet been decided if there will be an additional meeting in December.  You would need to check back at the end of next week to be certain.”

The end of week he’s referring to is presumably because that’s when the DC Register is published. According to the council rules for period 18[pdf], “15 days notice by publication in the District of Columbia Register is required prior to” holding a legislative meeting. That’s not necessary in the case of emergency legislation or for enacting internal council rules, but that doesn’t apply here.

If the council publishes notice of a special legislative session on this Friday the 4th, the soonest they should hold a legislative meeting and do the second reading of the gay marriage bill is on Monday the 21st. However there’s a loophole big enough to drive a truck through  in this clause:  “Less than 15 days notice of intended action or for a hearing on a bill or resolution may be given upon good cause found and published with the notice.”

It’s possible – and likely – that another session will be held before the new year. At that time they could give a second reading to this bill. However there’s not currently a legislative meeting scheduled for the 15th, and in fact there’s a committee of the whole meeting with its own agenda going on that day. So these repeated statements that there’s going to be a vote “in 15 days” is premature.

‘Date Night at the Legg Mason’
courtesy of ‘maxedaperture’

I got word of this one too late for it to go in the Comedy in DC feature this morning, but it sounds like it might be interesting: the Arlington Drafthouse is holding “Laugh Match,” a comedy show/speed dating hybrid. It’s December 5th at 9:45PM.

After the comedy performance, host Helen Hong (E!, TLC) and the four other comedians match single audience members up together for quick speed-dates there in the room, complete with running commentary, musical chairs, etc.

Tickets are $15, and it sounds like it might be a fun thing for people who aren’t easily embarrassed.  And if you go, drop me an email (tiffany at we love dc dot com), because I want to talk to you about it.